If you struggle with people-pleasing, reconnecting with anger may not mean becoming harsher. It may mean becoming more able to hear yourself, trust yourself, and set boundaries that reflect what is actually true for you.

The more you practice setting small boundaries, the more you learn to manage or accept the initial feelings of discomfort that come with saying “no,” and the more evidence you generate for yourself that the other person will be okay without your immediate response or help.

“Healthy dependence—or interdependence—is about relying on the people in your life in a way that strengthens your relationship(s) without losing connection to your sense of self and needs. It's the mutual support that people provide each other willingly and from a place of being emotionally, physically, and mentally.”